Sudan Gautam’s Blog

Most of the time i was regarded as a positive thinker in my group. I was so occupied to positive living that i always read books and articles on it and tried to practice it on my daily life. Whatever happened i just waited and tried my best to see the positive aspects of it and felt good when i was able to do it.It is said that “First we make habits and later habits make us” and i was being made by my positive living habit.  I felt everything was going well until i had a call from my friend saying ” sudan..santosh died because of bike accident”. I was so upset  that i just couldn’t realize when my eyes got misty and when i hunged up the phone. One of my friend in the group asked me and i told them about the incident. The guy said me ” You are a positive thinker why don’t you be positive man..Just change your state of mind”.

I felt as if i was being mocked. I just looked at him and replied ” Why should i change my state of mind?” Unexpected events will always occur in one’s life we just need to accept it and move on.Death is too going to take us sooner or later. We shouldn’t fight with  death as our enemy. As it is inevitable the fight with it will be nothing rather than a surely lost battle. Without wasting my time i went to my room. I was still upset so i stayed alone and cried for a while remembering how he made me feel when we were together.  After a moment of silence i came to realize that to feel sorry was good but allowing that feeling dwell on me where i could do nothing to change the situation was ridiculous.

I didn’t change the feeling and pretended that nothing had happened. I just sat alone and explored the feeling of being down as i had that feeling after a long time. I felt sorry for what had happened to my friend and his family but i couldn’t drag myself to cry on and ruin my day.After all what could i have done to change the  situation just by crying over it for a whole day?

It’s rally Ok to feel down. Who on earth doesn’t have to face this situation? We all will surely hear someone close to us saying goodbye  and if not we will surely be alone someday to live our life. But we aren’t prepared for this. The truth we need to know is we need some lows to experience the highs. Negative thoughts and events are like the birds flying over your head in the sky. You allow these birds to fly but you won’t allow them  to make a nest on your head or do you? Similarly don’t allow those negative thoughts to persist on your mind for a long time. Let those emotions come and go. Remember never ever try  to fight with the inevitable facts of life you will get nothing rather than disappointment. With all these thoughts i washed my face leaving all those negative emotions behind at least until the next time they were needed.

Even a day doesn’t passes without talking about a sex when you are with friends.It is not that you have no idea about it but every time what you feel is there might be something which you never knew and you just like to add it from the talk. These days i am hearing a lot of people talking about this topic though their intention and range of discussion might be different. By hearing those people what i would like to ask them is do we really know about what is sex? Before going further i would like to ask my reader”Is sex just an act?”

Though sex education has already been included on the education curriculum from school level why is our thinking about sex so limited that we are not being able to understand its true essence? Why is it considered one of the dirtiest thing to talk about and waste our time? Though people are having education still sex has been a topic that is condemned,repressed and truly misunderstood by our society and the question still goes why?

In most of the part of our country it has been considered as a taboo and if you even dare to talk about it you are considered irrational human being.Why so much fuss about sex?Why aren’t we being able to take it as a natural phenomenon?Why aren’t we able to take it as a need of human being when we think about it so many time a day?Why the word sex is just limited to lady and their body?Why can’t we associate it with some thing blissful?

Sex itself is not a problem but all those divided thoughts that people carry regarding it appears to be problematic. When we have started seeing it as a problem we begin to run away from it but still the thought about sex remains in our mind in a suppressed form. What we need to understand here is that no matter how much those thoughts are repressed they will erupt sooner or later.Aren’t those rapes, violence,abuse,pornography the result of repressed thoughts about sex?

The best thing to do here is to accept it naturally, think about it rather than not to think about it and understand it. Do not try to run away from it taking it as a problem because it will take a bigger form and you will find very difficult to handle it.Have a desire for sex as it is as natural as your thirst and hunger. If you are not able to take it easily than surely you will be taking it just as a means to have pleasure and which is very short lived when its proper understanding makes it a divine.Please do not believe what others have their opinion about sex.Make your own belief by exploring on this topic.Learn to be happy while talking about sex thinking that you are gaining some valuable information on it. Please be open to this topic and accept it freely.But be sure to neither repress it nor indulge it.

Let me add my final word over here.Take sex as just a part of life rather than the source that gives you instant gratification.Please don’t play hide and seek with it as it is a great source of creative energy.Let me close this with another thought provoking question”Aren’t we all the products of sex?”

Till next post just want you to have a greater vision about SEX!!!

To graduate from a college is really a good achievement. You feel as if you have done a lot and finally the problem of your life are now going to be solved. But after few days of its celebration surely you will begin to think what after this? At some stage you will realize that now the time has come to shoulder up the responsibility and feels as if you have no idea about what to do. Read all those books,cleared all those exams but still why i haven’t found the source of happiness?This question bugged me so i gave a time for self analysis. I sat calmly outside looking at the stars and asking myself what i have learned so far? I sat with a pencil and a paper and wrote all those things that i had learned till date which i would like to share with all of you.
1. The college days are simply a waste of time but it matters in real world.
2. No matter where you are the best thing that you can do is just upgrade yourself with all the resources that you have.(Google is the best teacher).
3.Never ever waste your time to know about all the things. since you will only know that things which you love. So why waste your time trying to learn all the things?
4. The best habit that you can acquire in college days is the Reading and writing habit.
5. Never believe everything which other say. Have your own research or at least Google it and come out with your own opinion.
6. No one cares about you as much as you do. If s/he is doing than they don’t deserve your time.
7.Your job won’t care of you when you are in problem your friends will do so stay in touch with them.
8.No matter whatever problem you are having someone else had it too. It says that there is always some alternative to solve things. Remember there is someone who has got bigger problem than yours at that right moment.
9.Don’t compare your life with others as most of the time you won’t have the faintest idea what their journey were all about.
10.No one will remember what you said but people will remember you for how you made them feel.
11.It is your life so live it rather than just showing existence.
12. No matter whatever the cost you have to pay go for your dreams.
13.Things will never be perfect.That someday will never come. Just give a start and you will enjoy it finding that it wasn’t that tough.
14.Having a lot of information hardly counts but what really counts is how much you have implemented.
15.If your life is comfortable and if you are enjoying it be sure you are not taking risk. Nothing on earth was invented or created sitting on the comfortable zone.So just get out of it.
16.If you can’t imagine where you want to be then you can’t be over there. First think what you want to be and how to be slowly comes out.
17.You will always cherish the true love that you have for someone.So love someone truly no matter what they do.
18.No matter however smart you are there is someone smarter than you and no matter however dull you are there is someone dull than you.
19.Common sense aren’t that common. Its really very hard to acquire them. Remember,when a person says Don’t mind it there is something to mind.
20.If you want change don’t change the mirror instead change the person standing in front of it.
21.Don’t waste your time on brainstorming. It hardly works. Most of the time your intuitions are right.
22. Remember Parkinson’s law works most of the time. If you can work on it you will grow.
23.Don’t read only what is on textbook read some books from the library or book shop. They teach you most of the life lesson.
24.Always give thanks to all those people who have helped you to become who you are today.
25.Stuffs never bring prolong happiness.So make your life as simple as you can.
There were a long list but what i have shared with you are very valuable to me and i believe it will be to you too.Never keep score of life its your life so play it bigger…..
Thank you for reading my blog.
Till next post take care and make sure you are living your life…..

Whenever I turn the calender’s page and find the month of  December i get into the world of thoughts.I just feel oh! the whole year has gone by but what did i achieve so far?Then i analyze my entire year as i did in my previous post”Analysis of the year 2009″ and sit down with a pen and paper to jot down my to do list for the upcoming year.

I believe a New Years Resolution should not be a dirty secret.It needs to be as transparent as possible so that you will have a challenge to accomplish them. I’m revealing it to you all and i know it will surely make me more focused towards it. Resolutions can be ranged very diversely so it is not a matter of concern what it has to do with other.My resolutions should be what provides me more pleasure and which helps me to grow wiser after the accomplishment.I totally agree that if you don’t have your own interesting things to do then you don’t have a good happy menu of your life.I have made these to do list not for the sake that it will  bring happiness in my life after they are accomplished but it’s my own way to discover my strengths and weakness and to proceed ahead in my life.Let me tell you that i am setting goals but i won’t postpone my joy.I have already told you how to enjoy your day in my previous post “How to make best out of a day?”Now i hope my resolutions will surely entice you to make best out of a year.

In order to be more specific i have divided my goal into different categories so that it will be easier for me to know which sectors are my field of interest and which are the sectors i haven’t covered.

1.Benefit Myself and other:

1. Volunteer somewhere for at least 1 hour.
2. Donate the money that i have on my pig box.
3. Donate blood 3 times.
4. Make a donation to a worthy cause.
5. participate in a large support event.
6. Send a gift to my friend without any reason.
7. Increase my weight and give a good shape to my body.

2.General

1. Get my salary raised.
2. Do not go online for consecutive 5 days.
3. Record total amount of money spent on a month.
4. Plant something from a seed.
5. Smile at everyone i see for an entire day.
6. put together an emergency kit in my room.
7. Call someone i haven’t talked to in at least six months.
8. Read around 20-25 books from my new list.
9. Enjoy a program at temple.
10. learn a foreign language at least being able to speak in a ge
11. Watch Oscar nominee movies and all those on my list.

3.Writing:

1. post an entry about my childhood.
2. Write around 15 post on my blog making it more specific.
3. Write ab article about the field which i haven’t got any idea just by all the help of information gathered.
4. Add on my to do list for life time and ask preety to give her point of view regarding this and add her too on it.
5. Write an article and ask the publication to publish on their paper.
6. Write a report which will stand as a example for reference to the juniors.

4.Travel and Destination:

1. Ride on a train.
2. Sleep outside under the stars.
3. Visit at least 2 new places and have a night stay program over there.
4. Ride motorcycle for a long distance which i haven’t done till date.
5. Go for Bungee jump.
6. Go trekking with my friends.
7. Watch a cover song or jazz at Thamel.
8. Attend a sporting event.
9. Watch world cup matches at large screen with all the guys.
10. Go to a street fair or Parade.

5.Art and culture:

1. paint a picture .
2. Support a craft person by purchasing handmade materials.
3. Attend a dance performance.
4. watch 5 dramas throughout the year at Gurukul.
5. Attend a concert .

6.Learn:

1. Learn few steps of dancing.
2. Learn few ideas and make my self techno-savvy.
3. Learn how to motivate people.
4. Hone my skills of public speaking.
5. learn the skills of personality development.
6. Learn new zen habits and try to improve them

7. Miscellaneous:

1. Scan and upload photos from my childhood.
2. Take some photos that make me feel proud.
3. Upgrade and redesign my blog and make it more professional.
4. Go to a art gallery and watch photos.
5. Eat 10 things i have never tried before.
6. Cook at least 1 dish i have  never cooked before at least once a month.
7. Eat only raw foods for a entire day.
8. Go for starvation for a day.
9. Go to a place alone and give time to myself.
10. Live a single day being totally penniless.

These are my list that I’m planning to do in the year 2010.I won’t feel bad even if i didn’t complete all of them after all its for my own sake.At least i will enjoy by completing as much as possible.I shall be adding new list if there are any which will really challenge me to finish it.I would really feel more than glad to know if you have your own resolution for the year 2010.Please share it i shall get an opportunity to know the different range of interest and i shall add them to my list if they are wonderful.How about adding not to do list on it? Wait i have few of them to share but in my next post.

Till the next post take care and have a great time.

see you when i see you!

I was just reading my favorite blogs where i saw the writer was writing about her 1001 days and the things she had achieved out of 101.I really loved it and thought why not about me.But at the very moment a next thought came to my mind about analyzing my year 2009 which was about to be completed.I had no effort to jot them down.I woke up around 3 am and all of sudden several thoughts began to hit at my mind.It was too cold and my lazy bones couldn’t take those single effort to get out of my bed.I knew those thoughts were good enough to be posted.I allowed them to come into my mind and got enough of it and covered my face saying Man its too early to get up!Around one hour I tossed  and turned just thinking what i was really wanting to do.Finally i threw the blanket and just  opened my Laptop and started to write what came into my mind.

Yeah!you might say its just Nov and how could you make analysis of 2009 until its over?I agree with you but i thought analyzing at this time can help me to make my other to do list complete before the deadline is over.I will surely edit my post after 2010 arrives which will make it a complete analysis.

let me share with you how much i had achieved through the year 2009

1.Completed my graduation.

2.Did two jobs.One at call center for USA shift and next one was as IELTS instructor and educational counselor.

3.Read 34 books and crossed my target of 25.

4.Got my laptop and it was given as a gift from my beloved preety.

5.Created my own blog by the help of my friend Anoop Panthi.

6.Talked about my relationship with my family and felt really good.

7.Went for the first time to the 5 star hotels of Nepal.(Soaltee crown plaza,yak and yeti,Hyatt, Radission)

8.Made more than 50 new friends and have been able to keep relationship very good with few of them.

9.Met my old friend Ambrish and the best part of it was that the chain of circle increased by leaps and bound.

10.I lost my grandma.

11.Changed my apartment from Gyaneshwor to Sinamangal and started to live with my childhood friend Niraj.

12.Learned to cook several new items from Niraj.

13.Had a great time with my friends Niraj,Prem,Sabin when sabin came on his vacation and the night at Thamel was really hilarious.

14.Went to several new restaurants in town where i had never been before.

15.Watched my first drama at gurukul and took it to the number 3.

16.I hadn’t expected it but i really felt good while donating my blood.I have decided to donate every year as far as possible.

17.watched all of the movies from my movie list.The best one were Into the wild,goodwill hunting,cast away,forest gump.

18.Started to read business magazines which i never used to.Thanks to ambrish and Rajeev bro.

19.Helped people who were in big trouble and developed my listening skills.

20.purchased gift to my family as a big surprise.Though it wasn’t the first one to them.

21.Drank beer after 2 years.Sorry preety i couln’t keep my promise.Hope you would understand that.

22.joined post graduation in business studies at WLC Nepal.

23.I didn’t manage to go to new place outside the valley which i feel really bad.

24.Joined a health club which was pending for years and years.

25.Took report writing class at British council which i had a great interest.But the classes weren’t that effective as i had expected.

26.Joined internet in my room which i had a sought after.It was all because of preety’s help i could manage to join it.I had so many precious moment and talks with her.I will cherish them forever.

27.Took   interview of people for the office which i was longing for.It was my first experience and i really enjoyed it.

28.Abolished my habit of watching TV when there’s no any particular program i adored.

29.Remained vegetarian for around 5 months and i came to know the life of vegetarian and the difficulty one had to face while living outside their home being vegetarian.

30.learned to be more assertive than servile.

31.Developed my skills of public speaking and never to hesitate to talk in a mass or with a stranger.

32.I couldn’t  manage to complete my word list and enrich my vocabulary.

33.There were several moments when i felt so helpless but i felt so alone when Niraj went to USA.But i’m glad i had my new room mate Krishna Nepal who is really very good.

34.Went to royal Museum and studied about the palace.

35.The best reading for the  year were:1.Rich dad poor dad 2.Your erroneous zone 3.five point someone 4.The magic of thinking big 5.The world is flat(going on).

To be contd…..

There is a different style of every individual how they take a new day ahead.If you are a self victimizing one then I’m sure you are living just your previous years life.Here what i mean is that you are living your 365 days just being multiplied by the time period you will be on earth.Its not that success and failure makes your life good and bad its your attitude towards it.Its you and only you who will have to suffer no one else as its your and only your life.I will be writing about those in my upcoming post but today i would like to share my personal view about the ways how I enjoy my each day and i hope it will be applicable to you to some extend.Before that,I would like to define life and happiness with the same definition.

Life is a journey and not a destination
Happiness is a journey and not a destination
If its same why not change it?lets change our style of defining them with our own way
Life is a journey and its high time to enjoy the journey.

Let me involve you more into it by sharing you the ideas of enjoying everyday to its fullest.These are the things that i love doing to make my day.If it works to you take it as a gratis.
1. Wake up with enthusiasm and take a deep breathe for being alive.

2. Write the thought that comes straightly to your mind before you wash your face at your personal journal.These thoughts are like your hunch and they are very powerful.

3. Include “Please” and “Thank you” in your conversations but don’t overact.

4. Treat your family and friends as if you hadn’t seen them in a week

5. Make a daily ‘to do’ list - you’ll be amazed how much will get done and how proud you will feel crossing off completed tasks.

6. Laugh, even if you are the cause of the laughter

7. Take 15 minutes to enhance your spirit. Whether that would be to give thanks to God or simply mediate without thinking about anyone.Just try to be completely zero.

8. When no one is looking dance and if you get a chance look at your whole body parts and appreciate them as much as possible.Make sure you turn off your clothes and appreciate the smell of your body too.

9. Behave like a child everyday doesn’t matter what it is.As such a childish activities will teach you how you can be happy and make others happy without associating with material things.

10. Learn something new which will help to develop your skills and enhance your personality too.Remember to teach what you have learned to others too.

11. Don’t hesitate to make mistakes.Take risk at least once everyday.You will learn new methods and it will help to built your confidence level too.

12.Never miss a chance to see sunrise or sunset.At least they will teach you to appreciate nature.

13. Listen to your favorite music and in addition listen to one of the song which you find really hilarious and play one song from your play list that you haven’t paid much attention to.Try it !you will feel good.

14. Give as much attention and effort at home with family as you do with people and tasks at work

15. Smile! It’s easy to do and will brighten everyone’s day…especially yours!

16.Learn from a child and animals as they always enjoy what they have today.They don’t know about the next day.

If you have your own idea to enjoy your day please feel free to share with me.Just post it on the comment box i will carry them if they are really worthy.At least i will try them once.Till next post just enjoy your day.